My Final Goodbye

I am fond of photography, and I take a lot of pictures when we are on vacation or special days, sometimes to an extent that my husband and daughter get irritated. Once, on our peaceful walk in the mountains of Mukteshwar, my husband asked me, "You are not a social media influencer, you hardly post pictures on any social media platform, and still your phone memory is always full of loads of pictures and videos. What will you do with all of them?" I just smiled and softly answered, "I will go through all of them when I grow old and about to die. I want to cherish all the special moments when my memory grows weak and be grateful for a fulfilling life. I will leave all those memories for my daughter as a treasure to cherish when I am not there."

When I am about to say my final goodbye, I wish to be surrounded by my favorite people watching the pictures I clicked, playing my favorite songs, dancing, eating, and laughing together and continue to do the same for the next days after I bid adieu.

There is a song which I am listening to, on repeat since last few days, I feel this is the conversation I will have with Mr. Yamraj (Death God) when he arrives to take me.

Kal Rat Aya Mere Ghar Ek Chor (Read as Mr. Yamraj/ Death God)
Aake Bola Dede Mujhe Joh Bhi Tera Hai
Maine Bola, Mera Nam Bhi Le Jaa Mera Kam Bhi Le Ja
Mera Ram Bhi Le Jaa Mera Shyam Bhi Le Ja

A thief (Read as Mr. Yamraj/ Death God) came to my house last night,
and demanded that I give him everything that belonged to me.
I responded by telling him to take my name, my work
my ‘Ram’, and my ‘Shyam’ (Religion/ God) too.

Mera Dar Bhi Le Jaa Mera Ghar Bhi Le Jaa
Mere Khwab Bhi Le Jaa Mere Raz Bhi Le Jaa
Mera Gham Bhi Le Jaa Har Zakham Bhi Le Jaa

Take away my apprehensions/fears, take away my home,
Take away my dreams, take away my secrets,
Take away my griefs and every pain.

Meri Zat Bhi Le Jaa Auqat Bhi Le Jaa
Meri Bat Bhi Le Jaa Halat Bhi Le Jaa
Le Ja Mera Joh Bhi Dikhe, Joh Na Dikhe Wo Bhi Le Jaa

Take away my social class; take away my position as well.
Take away my expressions; take away my circumstances too. Take away everything that is visible. Take away everything that is not visible as well.

Meri Jeet Bhi Le Jaa Meri Har Bhi Le Ja
Mera Dar Bhi Le Jaa Mera Ghar Bhi Le Ja
Meri Zat Bhi Le Jaa Auqat Bhi Le Ja

Take away my victories, take away my defeats
Take away my apprehensions/ fears, take away my dwelling
Take away my social class; take away my position as well

Meri Bat Bhi Le Ja Halat Bhi Le Ja
Mera Nam Bhi Le Ja Mera Kam Bhi Le Ja
Mera Ram Bhi Le Ja Mera Shyam Bhi Le Ja

Take away my expressions; take away my circumstances too
Take my name and my work too
Take my religion and God as well.

Kar De Mujhe Azad, Kar De Mujhe Azad, Aazad Azad
Kal Rat Aya Mere Ghar Ek Chor

I surrender everything to you, release me and set me FREE...

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My favorite childhood memory

It took me long to just decide which one of many is my favorite childhood memory. Since it's the month of January and festivals of Lohri and Sakranti just passed by, I felt nostalgic about how we celebrated these festivals when we were kids. I think our parents did a better job than us today in passing on the festive vibes to us even with limited resources. We celebrate Lohri on 13th Feb (the only sign we are Punjabi's apart from our surnames). It was celebrated with bon fire followed by prayers, dance and fun. Our extended families met at a common place, which meant the host prepared dinner for all, made sure the bon fire set-up was ready, the music systems and playlist was ready. Post the rituals, the women usually were busy chit chatting and clearing up the kitchen while the males left to the night kite market in Jaipur (which definitely is a place to visit if you are in Jaipur on that day). They returned back in an hour or so that was when the real fun began. All of us in our comfort wears, sitting on the floor in a common room making our kites ready (tang baandhna) for the next day (14th January- Makar Sakranti- crazy kite flying in Jaipur). Everyone had an assigned responsibility for the next day. Someone responsible for food supply to the terrace, someone for water, someone took care of the music system set-up and someone preparing the playlist of the songs, some busy moving all kites to the terrace, number of the kites was no less than 300 as many of our families and friends joined us on the day of Sakranti. We barely use to sleep for an hour or so, wake up early morning, take bath, do the prayer (the khidchdi donation) and just run away to the terrace. It was kind of an unsaid competition with all our neighborhood friends to be first on the terrace, play music at the maximum sound possible (must be an alarm for most of our neighbors). My Mamaji who is a pro at kite flying made sure his kite was highest up in the sky before anyone of us reached on the terrace. The kite was invisible to us (only the thread in his hand moving). By the time most of our neighbors started flying, his invisible kite's thread acted like a sword (long distance of the kite makes it very heavy) and before they could understand anything their kite was gone followed by a loud sound from our group "Wo kataaaaa". After flying the same kite for many hours, his friends broke the thread without him knowing (because they knew if his kite went they were the once to roll all the thread). It was so much fun to see everyone laughing their hearts out, make fun of each other, prank each other, many friends and family members visiting us during the day. During the evening, our yellow and white kites went up with lantern tied on the thread (not sure if they still come with candles placed inside them). The thread was beautifully lit with 3-4 lanterns and yellow kite still visible in the dark sky. By the end of the day, we were all sitting tying bandages on each other's fingers as they were all cut by manjha. Flaunting the cuts next day at school, the more the cuts the more the pakka Jaipurite you were considered 😀 Fun days... Hope to have them back!

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My Final Goodbye

Stuti Arora

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My favorite childhood memory

Stuti Arora